Nelson
Rolihlahla Mandela, the former president of South Africa once said, “It always
seems impossible until things are done.”
This was how it was like to me when everything was done. To fulfil the requirement of the coursework
of Language Development III (PI 1352 P), I have to participate a forum and does
an individual reflection. Now, it was finally done. Thank God for everything.
I
was with my same usual group with Dorina Wong Ming, Low Loo Ken and Soon Ming
Hui. I volunteered and was appointed as the moderator of our forum. As the
group leader, I had an overall responsibility to gather my group members and
lead the discussion. We had discussions, rehearsals and preparations before the
presentation day and I have learnt new knowledge on the journey.
The
issue we set forth for our forum was families and marriages with the topic
Marital Breakdown: Divorce or Not?’ This was a topic related to every one of
us. Although we are still too young to experience marriage, we thought that a
lot of us might have seen cases of parents fighting in our own families. Our
aim is that to provide prior knowledge on marriages before getting into one so
that to increase awareness among the young generation about conflicts in
relationships.
To
make myself as a moderator on the subject area, I had done an extensive
research on the topic and equipped myself with sufficient knowledge on marital
breakdowns and divorces. The most important thing that I have learnt is that a
lot of misunderstanding and arguments start off with miscommunication. I was
affected as a learner, to try to appreciate and understand people around me and
to be careful on my speech because words are often harmful weapons. Thus, my
plan for future interpersonal relationship management is that to practice the
arts of speaking and listening, according to Rebecca Kimbel’s (Motivational
Speaker)speech: to validate and accept what is heard and to always speak with
respect, compassion and sincerity.
Now,
talking about what I felt, after the forum, it was a great relieved that we have
done fine. I knew that I have learnt a lot and it was a wonderful learning
experience. It was a little bit stressful for me to lead and work with this
small group since we have a distinct expectation on our working process and on
our final product. Nonetheless, it was a great learning process. I have studied
on the fundamental skills of conducting a forum, learnt about paralinguistic
skills and also changed my perspective on certain things in life.
First
of all, I had done a lot of self-learning beforehand regarding the elements of
a well-conducted forum. From my research, I have found out that to conduct a
good forum, an interesting topic is a must therefore my group members and I
started out from deciding an interesting issue that would trigger minds. After
that, as the moderator, I played a big part in determining and deciding the
group dynamics. As a team, we discussed on the tips that I found on managing
group dynamics such as creating time limits for each discussion items, planning
the sequence of speaking, determine how questions from the audience will be
handled and also setting the mood of our forum.
Besides
that, I, as a moderator, have also done a brief searching through Google search
engine regarding the role of a moderator. I learnt that a moderator does not
usually have a conflict of interest with the subject matter of the panel
discussion. She is the emcee of the discussion, keeps conversation moving,
adheres to and enforces the guidelines and rules of the panel discussion. I
have also asked my friends about ways to handle question and direct question to
the panellists. I tried out the tips provided during rehearsals so that I would
not be awkward handling question from the floor.
Furthermore,
I have improved on my paralinguistic communication skills. It is more than
important that one having good paralinguistic skills in a forum where spotlight
is focused on you. According to Henely and Schott, language is more than just
words; paralinguistic skills are the crucial part that we give to enhance our
speech. I have looked into the intonation, emphasis, volume and pace of my
speech. I sought help from the seniors and they advised me to put more effort
on my intonation. Thus, I have tried to adopt a more professional way to
present my speech. Also I had been constantly reminding myself about the
non-verbal norms (eye contact and hand gesture) and cultural features (ways of
indicating agreement and being polite). Paralinguistic communication skill is
most essential to conduct an engaging forum.
Besides
all English language skills, to handle interpersonal relationship is one of the
things I learnt. Although my group members and I always work together since
semester 1, the difference in thinking still did, lead us to minor arguments
and debates. However, the important skill I learnt had helped me much in
resolving misunderstands. As an action for change, I learnt to step back and
pause to look, listen and reflect. It, all the time, never failed to give me
peace conclusion as it allowed me to think critically to identify things that I
would not otherwise notice. Showing appreciation to group members, editing
peers’ work and also giving constructive feedbacks are especially important. To
separate myself with the perfectionism in me was hard but it has to be done to
ensure collaboration. In this case, constructive communication plays a big
role. To give constructive harmless comments are possible if the commenter
practices appreciation and respect towards the receivers.
“If you can dream it, you can do it.”
Walt Disney once said. In conclusion, I think I did well in my job and
responsibility as a moderator. I tried
new things, failed a dozen times and then finally succeed. I screwed up things,
fixed problems and learnt from every single detail. However, everything was
worthwhile when our forum was well conducted.
The glorious moment and the sweet memories will forever imprint in my
mind. It was a ravishing and lovely experience!
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