REFLECTION 3 - KOK JIA XUAN

         First of all, I would like to express my sincerest gratitude to Ms Sophia for giving me a chance to improve my skills in speaking.

Finally, the forum has ended successfully. Every group has put in all their hearts in the preparation for the forum. Despite the competition, I am glad because this is where we can learn from each other and to improve on our weak points too. I enjoyed the whole process of the preparation for this forum, starting from our selection of the topic for the forum till our actual assessment day of the forum. I have gained precious knowledge and irreplaceable experiences through this forum.

We started our preparation with deciding the topic of our forum. We first researched online to decide on the topic that we would like to talk about. After the research, the topic of plastic surgery and cloning were shortlisted as the two most appealing topics for us. We then voted for the final topic that we would like to have a deeper understanding of. We finally selected the topic of genetic cloning for it is more controversial. The public reaction toward the idea of cloning is polarised into two extreme, where it can be clearly seen through the quotes by two professionals, first by Kass (1997), which expresses his disagreement towards cloning where he says that, “A society that allows cloning has, whether it knows it or not, tacitly said yes to converting procreation into manufacture and to treating our children as pure projects of our will." While on the opposing side, Coupland (1991), remains optimistic towards the idea of cloning, “Cloning is great. If God made the original, then making copies should be fine.”

I love this topic very much for it is very current despite being slightly unrelated to the context of Malaysia. Being a child I have always enjoyed watching informative channels such as Discovery Channel or Animal Planets, where I was being exposed to many of the topics related to Science. I remembered I was deeply intrigued by the idea of cloning when they documented on this topic. This is because they have compared human cloning to twins saying that human cloning is creating two identical person and they claimed twins as natural cloning (Discovery News). I, being a twin myself, was attracted to this theory. What is human cloning actually? I asked myself. However, this question mark that popped in my head was never answered as I soon forgot about it. Many years later, in this teaching course, I realised the need for this question to be answered. However, sadly, due to the complicity of the human cloning, we have decided not to zoom into that topic.

We later outlined the things we wanted to discuss during our forum because this topic is very wide and it can be discussed from different perspectives. We finally agreed to zoom into the section of food cloning because it is closer to our daily lives and we can relate to it for America and some of the European country has already legalised the production of cloned meat. Subsequently, we divided ourselves into different roles according to our interest in different fields related to the topic. I picked up the role as a nutritionist who has studied the pros and cons of the cloned meat.

After deciding everyone’s role, we worked by ourselves to find information suitable for each of our roles. Our first draft was soon completed and the next thing we did is to edit our script. Ting Ngiik Ying, being elected as our chairperson, was the one who has responsibility to create the flow of our forum and to add dynamics into it. Our script has gone through several times of editing before coming into a final piece. At last, we have sat down to discuss on our turn to present our ideas and argument so that our forum flows nicely.

A few days before the forum, we have allocated some time to make sure our forum a success. We rehearsed on our forum and corrected our own pronunciation for certain words. Besides, we have also spent some time to also discuss about a nice outfit for each of our roles and in the end we have achieved a satisfying result. I believed that all of us have dressed appropriately according to our roles.

Through this forum, I have learnt that one must sow to reap the harvest of success. Every group has worked hard, but apparently there are always some groups who have appeared to achieve a higher standard at the end. I believed that we have given our best. However, some must have worked harder than anyone else could and that is why they can excel in their forum. I admired their passion and persistency, and looked up to them as my role model and also an alarm to remind myself to work harder in the future. I would like to share a quote from the Bible, in 2 Corinthians 9:6, saying that, “Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously.” This has warned humans to be persistent in doing their work, and to give their fullest to everything that happens in their life.

             After the forum, our course lecturer, which is Ms Sophia, gave a brief session with each of the group to tell us the strength and weaknesses in our group. Right after the forum, I have looked through our video for the forum as I received critiques and comments from my friends that our voice projection is very weak throughout the forum. Besides, I was also worried that I might not have good sitting or speaking posture. After watching through the video, I have found out that indeed my voice modulation is poor. However, I think that my posture has improved compared to last semester. After receiving the comments from Ms Sophia, I agreed with what she had said, and I will try to improve on it in the future.

Despite the moderate marks we get for our forum, I was very happy for my group member Sze Miin for she has improved compared to last semester. She has tried her best this time, I believed. Not only that, we are also very proud of ourselves for we have actually presented a topic with such high difficulties which required us to think critically in order to understand it fully. We have gone through gruelling hours during the preparation for our script and understanding the concept of cloning and the information we have gained is truly beneficial to us. I wish to thank my group members for their encouragement and I felt that our relationship has improved since our first collaboration.

In conclusion, this coursework has not only encouraged me to become a more humble learner, it has also brought our group members together. Together we have learnt and shared the joy and grief in completing a great task. We have learnt from each other’s strength and also corrected on each other’s weaknesses. Lastly, I would like to share a quote from Henry Ford, symbolising the ending of our assignment and also beginning of our better future assignments, “Coming together is the beginning. Keeping together is progress. Working together is success.” It is my pleasure to have this chance for improvement towards a better me.

REFLECTION 2 - YOUNG POH PING

         Cohabitation is undergoing an accelerating trend in the recent past. Many young couples decided to live together without engagement or marriage. As one of the member of my group, I agreed to select cohabitation as the issue to discuss in our forum. One of the purposes we selected this issue is because we want to have a deeper insight on the bright side as well as the downside of cohabitation. At the same time, we realized cohabitation is a focus issue of media as well as academic research. We are fervent to know whether it is a right choice for couples to cohabit before marriage. If it is not, what are the criteria that couples need to weigh up and reflect on before they opted to cohabit?  Consequently, all of my group members came to an agreement that cohabitation will be an appealing yet attention-grabbing issue to be discussed about. We will be able to convey useful messages to the audience, especially the young generation.

           

One question struck my mind when I was doing my research on cohabitation. Is there any difference between cohabitation and marriage? Initially, I assumed cohabitation is different from marriage as cohabitation is informal and there is no legal documentation occurring between the two partners. It is possible that cohabitation and marriage is not identical (Joyner, 1999). For unmarried couples, they are less likely to share the ownership of the house and resources (Blumstein, 1983). The possibilities to establish a strong and long-lasting relationship is also lower (Bumpass, 1983). The degree of respect among partners may also differ from couples who are legally married.

           

I believe there are both pros and cons to everything. I have read an article from Asia Times saying that the Singapore Government is currently worrying about the increasing divorce rate and decreasing birth rate. I think such scenario occurred because most of the couples in the modern society cohabit before marriage without realizing that it actually weakens a marriage relationship afterward and therefore contributes to the acceleration of divorce rate. Although many people including myself believe that it is better to have a trial period before you buy or invest in something, I realized it is the opposite for marriage. Marriage is a whole life commitment. Couples need to build compatibility in order to maintain a lasting relationship, not test it (Harley, 1996).

           

I discovered that cohabitation is an agreement without commitment. Some people might say that marriage is only a piece of license but I think marriage is far more beyond that. In marriage, couples often encounter differences of values, loyalty, freedoms, feelings and labors. This is when commitment for marriage plays a significant role. Commitment is essential to develop a successful marital relationship (Mace, 1989). Couples who share commitment in their marriage care and be thoughtful for each other at all times. They love and cherish each other even if they find themselves in adverse condition.

           

In addition, I learned that it is always advantageous to consider all pros and cons when making a decision of major importance. Decision is about dealing with the consequences. The same goes to making the decision to cohabit before marriage. It is important to ensure we make the right choice because we are the one who have to live with them after all. As a teacher trainee, I understand that I need to acquire the skills of decision making because I will be the leader of my class in the coming future. A good decision making skill reflects acquirement of leadership quality.

           

In a nutshell, I highly acknowledge the opportunity to conduct a forum because I learned to carry myself confidently which is an invaluable experience. I appreciate the knowledge that I gained and it serves as the guidelines of my life. 

REFLECTION 1 - YEAN YAN TONG

Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela, the former president of South Africa once said, “It always seems impossible until things are done.”  This was how it was like to me when everything was done.  To fulfil the requirement of the coursework of Language Development III (PI 1352 P), I have to participate a forum and does an individual reflection. Now, it was finally done. Thank God for everything.

I was with my same usual group with Dorina Wong Ming, Low Loo Ken and Soon Ming Hui. I volunteered and was appointed as the moderator of our forum. As the group leader, I had an overall responsibility to gather my group members and lead the discussion. We had discussions, rehearsals and preparations before the presentation day and I have learnt new knowledge on the journey.

The issue we set forth for our forum was families and marriages with the topic Marital Breakdown: Divorce or Not?’ This was a topic related to every one of us. Although we are still too young to experience marriage, we thought that a lot of us might have seen cases of parents fighting in our own families. Our aim is that to provide prior knowledge on marriages before getting into one so that to increase awareness among the young generation about conflicts in relationships. 

           

To make myself as a moderator on the subject area, I had done an extensive research on the topic and equipped myself with sufficient knowledge on marital breakdowns and divorces. The most important thing that I have learnt is that a lot of misunderstanding and arguments start off with miscommunication. I was affected as a learner, to try to appreciate and understand people around me and to be careful on my speech because words are often harmful weapons. Thus, my plan for future interpersonal relationship management is that to practice the arts of speaking and listening, according to Rebecca Kimbel’s (Motivational Speaker)speech: to validate and accept what is heard and to always speak with respect, compassion and sincerity.

Now, talking about what I felt, after the forum, it was a great relieved that we have done fine. I knew that I have learnt a lot and it was a wonderful learning experience. It was a little bit stressful for me to lead and work with this small group since we have a distinct expectation on our working process and on our final product. Nonetheless, it was a great learning process. I have studied on the fundamental skills of conducting a forum, learnt about paralinguistic skills and also changed my perspective on certain things in life.

First of all, I had done a lot of self-learning beforehand regarding the elements of a well-conducted forum. From my research, I have found out that to conduct a good forum, an interesting topic is a must therefore my group members and I started out from deciding an interesting issue that would trigger minds. After that, as the moderator, I played a big part in determining and deciding the group dynamics. As a team, we discussed on the tips that I found on managing group dynamics such as creating time limits for each discussion items, planning the sequence of speaking, determine how questions from the audience will be handled and also setting the mood of our forum.

Besides that, I, as a moderator, have also done a brief searching through Google search engine regarding the role of a moderator. I learnt that a moderator does not usually have a conflict of interest with the subject matter of the panel discussion. She is the emcee of the discussion, keeps conversation moving, adheres to and enforces the guidelines and rules of the panel discussion. I have also asked my friends about ways to handle question and direct question to the panellists. I tried out the tips provided during rehearsals so that I would not be awkward handling question from the floor.

Furthermore, I have improved on my paralinguistic communication skills. It is more than important that one having good paralinguistic skills in a forum where spotlight is focused on you. According to Henely and Schott, language is more than just words; paralinguistic skills are the crucial part that we give to enhance our speech. I have looked into the intonation, emphasis, volume and pace of my speech. I sought help from the seniors and they advised me to put more effort on my intonation. Thus, I have tried to adopt a more professional way to present my speech. Also I had been constantly reminding myself about the non-verbal norms (eye contact and hand gesture) and cultural features (ways of indicating agreement and being polite). Paralinguistic communication skill is most essential to conduct an engaging forum.

Besides all English language skills, to handle interpersonal relationship is one of the things I learnt. Although my group members and I always work together since semester 1, the difference in thinking still did, lead us to minor arguments and debates. However, the important skill I learnt had helped me much in resolving misunderstands. As an action for change, I learnt to step back and pause to look, listen and reflect. It, all the time, never failed to give me peace conclusion as it allowed me to think critically to identify things that I would not otherwise notice. Showing appreciation to group members, editing peers’ work and also giving constructive feedbacks are especially important. To separate myself with the perfectionism in me was hard but it has to be done to ensure collaboration. In this case, constructive communication plays a big role. To give constructive harmless comments are possible if the commenter practices appreciation and respect towards the receivers.

“If you can dream it, you can do it.” Walt Disney once said. In conclusion, I think I did well in my job and responsibility as a moderator.  I tried new things, failed a dozen times and then finally succeed. I screwed up things, fixed problems and learnt from every single detail. However, everything was worthwhile when our forum was well conducted.  The glorious moment and the sweet memories will forever imprint in my mind. It was a ravishing and lovely experience!

A Letter to Daddy and Mummy

Dear my lovely daddy and mummy,

Since my early childhood, both of you pampered and showered me with all your love. I remembered people always said that the middle daughter in a family usually will not receive full attention from the parents. As your second daughter, I did not feel that I was being ignored at all. Instead, I am feeling so blessed and loved because God provided me such a great opportunity for me to be your daughter.

            

Mummy and daddy, although you laid high expectations on my academic performance since I was in primary school, I did not think that you had forced me to study. You sent me to tuition classes almost every day in a week but I never blamed you that I had no chance to play or shout or chase happily like other neighbors did. You raised me in a strict way that I must finish all my homework right after school and do revisions whenever there was free time.

            

After I entered secondary school, I was sensible enough to start doing my homework and revision on my own. There were times when I burnt the midnight oil to do extra studies and you started to worry about my health. I remembered mummy had made some hot beverages or chicken essence for me. It was warm that there is someone who care and always be there for me whereas daddy woke up in the midnight and asked me to go to bed and do not push myself too hard. The day before I got my SPM results, I asked mummy what if I failed to get an excellent result. And you said, “No, I believe in you. You will get at least 8As.” I was glad that I did not disappoint you. I achieved what I had always targeted. I got 11As in my SPM. Feeling so touch, I hugged you tightly. Daddy even shed his tears seeing my results.

           

I thought naively that I would be able to grab a scholarship, at least local scholarship or enter a teacher training institute with my results. But unfortunately I did not get anything. I had no choice and I headed to Form 6. I was so frustrated seeing my Malay classmate enter UNIMAS with her 5As results. What an unfair world I thought. I cried and daddy was so worried. I cried even harder when daddy told me not to give up so easily and try to apply for the second time. I was in Upper Six when I finally got the offer from teacher training institute. Daddy immediately bought me the air ticket because you knew very well that it is my ambition to be a teacher.

            

Now I am in the third semester of my foundation year. I still miss home and I am looking forward to seeing both of you in the coming holiday. You have raised me so well that I treasure and appreciate our family bond. It is infinity love that held us close together. I love you, daddy and mummy!

Love,

Poh Ping

A Letter to Mum and Dad

Dear Mom and Dad,

I would like to tell you how much you mean to me as you have guided and loved me throughout my life. Now I am 19-year-old and life has taught me how exceptionally lucky I have been to have grown up in such a loving environment. Both of you are always my role models who love one another and portray good values. When I was young, you taught me the importance of family and love. You also taught me not to give up on anything that I have decided.

I am the youngest among the three siblings and all of us have slightly different memories of our upbringing, and the usual sibling rivalries existed. My brother and sister always tell me that how lucky I am for being the youngest in the family.

From what I understand, most parents give a lot of stress to their kids. However, you never demand perfect grades from me. When I got a B in the test, you would just ask me to work harder as you believed that I could do even better. I want to thank you for trusting me and telling me that you are proud of me whenever I perform well in tests.

Actually, I dislike you, mum, for once. When I got the offer letter to study as a teacher trainee, you refused to let me go. You insisted just because my sister regretted studying as a teacher trainee. Hence, you thought that one day I would regret too, but the reality is, my sister and I are two different people. We may have different personalities, different hobbies and different ambitions. Moreover, I knew that the other reason for you to refuse the offer letter is because of you thought that Sabah is a very far place from our hometown. After I insisted and rebelled, you finally agreed. I would like to thank you, mum, for listening to my voice and allowing me to follow one of my dreams and also a great, big thank to my dad who always supports the decision I have made.

Dear Mom and Dad, thank you for all the support and love you have given to me and I thank God for the amazing parents he gave me. I honestly could not have gotten this far without you. You are the best parents in the world. Thank you for everything. I love you both so much.

Love,

Siok Yong.

A Letter to My Mother

Dear mummy,

First of all, thank you for everything that you have done in order to raise me up. I appreciate that I have such a mother like you; you are a softhearted and gentle mother. However, you are also a strict and serious mother when I did something wrong. I still remember when I was small, I was afraid of you. You used to cane me when I was naughty and did something disrespectful to you and dad. When I was still a little girl, I was quite naughty right? You asked me many times to do something but I never listened, then you would use your ultimate weapon, the cane, to beat me. It was painful but you just want me to listen to you and became a good girl.

When I was in secondary school, I was quite rebel. I liked things my way. I was a bad child and a worse teen. I started to revolt, resisted against your words, be friends with juvenile delinquents, got involved in boyfriend-and-girlfriend stuff, and loitered around outside until very late at night. Mum, you did not beat me anymore but you took away my cell phone and set a curfew for me. You gave me advice and tried hard to pull me back from the negative. I knew you were sad and hurt by me, mum, I am so sorry about that. I was once disliked how you teach me; I think that you were forcing me to do something that I was unwilling to do. But despite my rebellion, I wanted to tell you that I think you have done an amazing job.

Mum, you are anything but ordinary. I have so many reasons to thank you. I don’t even know where to start. I love you, mum. I know how fortunate I am because you have shaped me by being the person you are and become a useful person. Mum, thank you for not being like the other mothers. Thank you for not forcing me to do the things that I am not willing to do. Thank you for not caring what other people think. Thank you for being wacky and wonderful always. Thank you for not comparing me to the other kids.

Mum, how did you manage to get healthy, home-cooked meals on the table every day? Eating out was such a rarity, and I totally dislike eating outside. I prefer your home cooked dishes but now that I am away from home. I miss your foods so much. When I was at home, I did not need to think and to worry about what to eat; there would always be meals on the dining table. However, I am away from home now and I could bear to eat outside, the food is not delicious at all! Thank you for teaching me the importance of nutrition and sitting down as a family for dinner every night. Thank you for teaching me how to cook, and for making it fun by letting us be responsible for choosing recipes and helping you make them. Sitting together and eating are the most important elements in order to make the relationship among the family to become closer. You taught me this and I would like to practice this when I get married and have children in the future.

You’re an optimist, and you are always my BFF. If I’m nervous, I would call you. If I’m scared, you’re there to say I can do it. I count on you for that, Mum, and you never let me down. When I faced problems, you always stay by my side and tried to be a good listener. When I was happy, you would like me to share with you, just like sisters did. Your attitude makes me learn from you and I have become quite similar with you.

Thanks, Mom, for everything. Love you, love you, and love you!

 Love,

Ngiik Ying.